Charlie Umhau and i used to be neighbors back when we both lived in Richmond, Virginia.
it was a while before i realized the jovial wild-haired being, who always greeted me on the sidewalk with a grin and a wave, was the same one on Instagram commenting on and resonating with my wild and creative musings (and here is just one of the many examples of how the internet has brought the most remarkable people into my physical world).
though we really only had the opportunity to become friends and hang out for a short time before he moved to New Orleans, there was an instantaneous connection in our conversations and ways of viewing and loving the world.
from our common ideas on rewilding, our mutual experience of feeling a little-bit different than everyone else around us, to answering the call of leading and living a life counter to what our society told us to live.
Read Morei don't remember the first time i thought about driving across the country.
there are many dreams that live inside of me that feel like they've just always been there. often i can remember various details and mile stones that attributed to their growth and permanence within me, but i don't always remember their conception.
the American road trip is one of those kinds of dreams.
(a related side note: after i wrote this whole post, i vaguely recalled writing about this dream years ago and after searching my archives, came across this from 2013. so, you know, there's at least one recorded mile stone for you.)
i think sometimes there is this unspoken expectation in our society, in regards to our dreams and the things we tell others we want to do. which is that for some reason they require justification by means of history and long-time desire and even a communicated "always" to validate them. i'm not sure why that is really. perhaps the drive to be different and one-of-a-kind and original. we didn't just see someone on instagram do that and now we want to, we are deeper and more thought out and planned than that. we wanted to do that before it was "cool".
all of that to say, it feels important to communicate the "i've always wanted to do this" tagline not as a way of validating my desire, and elevating it over anyone else's that may be similar, but more so to simply revel in, and celebrate, the finality of finally embarking and choosing action and motion in regards to this long-held dream.
a fact that feels important in more ways than one for me. many of which i am not able, nor will i try, to communicate here.
Read MoreWaldeinsamkeit (German): The feeling of solitude, being alone in the woods, and a connectedness to nature.
//
these words remind me of the ways in which i want to be like you, trees of the woods.
rooted.
grounded.
that is what i wish to be.
like you, with my feet in the dirt and my arms open-handed towards the sky.
for, like you, i too come from dirt.
like you, i was made with a makers hands.
hands that fashioned my spirit and soul to intrinsically love being exactly here.
here, in-between and next-to your rough skin and the before-during-after of you undressing and redressing your arms and torsos with the garments of leaves and moss— according to the season.
here, amidst the light-to-dark dappling of the shade of your embrace.
here, where i am reminded of that beginning point of my creation and how i came to be.
here, that my solitude brings with it feelings of release, ease, tranquility and comfort rather than ones of loneliness, restriction, fear and isolation.
i love how being here in the depth and wildness of you brings me that gift.
of grounding in myself.
of connection.
Read Morei wrote the post below one week ago, and meant to post it then but didn't have internet again until now.
i am home now, from the below mentioned travels, and i find myself even more in need of the mantra at the bottom of this post than i was this time a week ago.
two weeks of concentrated travels and time spent with people and new experiences was a lot for me. i loved and reveled in every second of it, but now, settling back home i'm experiencing one hell of a come-down and withdrawal in a weirdly backwards and unexpected way.
as someone who is used to and thrives in being alone more often than not, i've been disoriented by my lack of desire for it after this trip. however there's so much i have to process and understand from both New Orleans and Atlanta that i'm only able to do by myself. a lot of wonderful things happened while i was away, especially in the way of eye opening conversations with people. there were a LOT of those. perhaps my feeling of overwhelm with that aspect especially is due in part to me being such a words person, but i also think there was some heightened level of importance in many of the things discussed with both new and old friends these last few weeks.
Read Morefor quite some time now i've been holding this idea of doing film photo essays on various artists i love and admire and sharing them here on the journal.
film is a format of photography that i increasingly fall in love with as the years go by.
indeed, i often prefer it over its digital counterpart. while i shoot digitally for work most of the time, there is a mystical, etherial and nostalgic way about film that just can't ever quite be replicated with digital images.
for these reasons, as well as the often imperfect and one-time-shot aspects of the medium, i have come to treasure my film photos in a way i'm not sure i'll ever feel about any other kind of photo.
yesterday i re-shared this post of photos from Anna's home in Portland Oregon, but it wasn't until recently that i developed the remaining rolls from this trip. so in addition to her lovely home, here you can see some vignettes from her studio space as well.
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![Portland Oregon | Anna's House In Film]()
this is, admittedly somewhat of a small re-post as i did share some of these photos in A Small Collection of Photos That Make Me Happy around this time last year. however, i recently developed some more film, and among the images were a few more of Anna's beautiful home that i really wanted to share (besides, it's been a year, so most of you probably haven't even seen these). so i am compiling and re-sharing them all again here, along with the somewhat repeated adage of how happy it makes me to scroll through these photos.
film is truly, increasingly, becoming my favorite format in the way of image capturing.
although i do use my iPhone to take photos on a daily basis, as well as my big digital DSLR camera for the majority of my work related shoots, and cannot deny the ease and convenience and indeed my own kind of love for both of these formats of taking photos, film will always stand alone as a special, nostalgic and one-of-a-kind way of documentation for me.
Read Morei have been on the go a lot over the past few months, and though i've been a traveler for years, i feel like i am just now getting to a point where i have the whole packing just-what-i-need thing down!
so today i wanted to share a little bit about how i implement my slow living mindset into what i pack when i'm traveling. starting with some of my toiletries, because i noticed that's where i have the most opportunity for setting the tone of my trip and implementing a healthy and intentional mindset.
Read Moremeet Halldóra and Hobie. the sweetest and kindest spirits in the most beautiful landscape.
they gave me such a wonderful experience and introduction to Iceland, i loved seeing the country through their eyes and their stories.
Read Moreyou all might remember this post from last fall involving my work with the dreamy Upper West Side plant and flower shop, PlantShed.
i have since had the privilege of working with them again and, for the foreseeable future, will be continuing to do so!
to say that this is a dream job is an understatement. being able to work with plants and cool people in one of my favorite cities? yep. all the makings of a dream job.
Read MoreIceland.
a place full of wander and wonder.
i'm finally going through the many photos i took in that ethereal place, and here are the ones from visiting the Grotta Lighthouse my first day there. jet lagged, cold, most likely hungry (because i'm always hungry) but so, incredibly, alive and happy.
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